Throughout my life until not long ago I would have a recurring memory come to mind often enough that it was familiar to me to receive it until it became comforting to be reminded of it. I know now that it was meant to be a reminder of friendship and that we are always and will always be with you. I was ten years old and I climbed a tree in our back yard in Bellingham WA. We were leaving to move to Arizona the next day. This would be the last time I would ever be in these woods. I climbed the tree and I was very distraught. I was crying and I felt an emotion that I couldn’t identify at the time and wasn’t able to until I had my own children and I witnessed the same emotion in them as we transitioned from living in a house to living in a trailer in the mountains, essentially homeless but with a great view.
That emotion was helplessness. Throughout my life I have experienced that same emotion thou I may not have been able to identify it at the time. And throughout my life I can look back on those times and each time this story would come back to mind and it always made me feel a little bit better; even if I didn’t realize it in the moment.
I was in the tree and I saw movement below on the game trail. The trail ran from my left to my right through the small wooded area that was to my child’s mind was immense but in reality maybe a hundred feet wide at it’s widest. Below walked a very large opossum. It was mid-day, not normal to see these creatures in the middle of the day. I had seen these things before but was still impressed. It slowly walked from my right to my left away from me towards the other end of the woods. The grasses and blackberry vines and small trees obscured the path in places but I had a good view of it’s traverse. Suddenly it stopped still fell over and rolled over onto it’s back. It laid there motionless for a moment then it’s entire body spasmed and then went limp while it’s tongue rolled out of it’s mouth. It was playing dead, and it deserved an Oscar for it’s performance. In the next moment a short haired dog appeared, hound like and lean with a mottled brown, beige, white and dark brown coat. It came from the bushes next to the trail at a 90 degree angle to the opossum. The dog which I didn’t recognize sniffed the opossum a bit then gingerly stepped over the animal playing dead and walked off into the tall grasses/bushes across the trail on the other side (dogs, coyotes etc. do not step over dead animals they step around them). A few moments later the opossum jerked too, rolled over then stood up and walked along it’s merry way unharmed.
This vision recurred to me often in the years since and has been replaying recently but now with much more clarity to it’s purpose but now it makes me laugh a bit at it’s simplicity and genius alike. You see; not until I had gone through the stages of grief in regards to sighting and communicating with a young lady sasquatch although taller then me at 6 foot while hunting in Colorado. The stages of grief are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally acceptance.
I experienced all these emotions within a few moments and it was only because I was ready for it after nearly 20 years from an experience when I was 20 and after nearly 30 years from this experience in the woods; I was finally ready to over come the stages of grief in regards to accepting my sasquatch experiences. Recognizing the stages of grief are the best tool I have to describe the emotions involved and the process of overcoming them.
Once again I am reminded that I am loved and protected. A few examples of that protection: once something grabbed both my thighs and put me down on the deck of a crab boat after I was dragged out over the rail while my thumb was wedged in a broken weld on the crab pot. There was no one around me, the hook man was on the other side of the pot when it slammed down. I fell while climbing or rather falling into some rocks and the fall pushed my frontal lobe bones up over the skull bones behind it, essentially giving me a pretty serious concussion. When I came too I barely made it off the mountain and found a women’s voice yelling at me from what seemed a hundred miles away in my head to “turn around you’re going the wrong way.” If I hadn’t stopped when I did I would have walked off another rocky ledge into the dark woods below. I found my way back to the trail and wandered into a surprised camp site with a very helpful couple who took me to town the next day.
I have many other experiences as well, some good some bad.
Since my experience in Colorado 3 years ago the channels or paths to my memories have been opened up here and there as I’ve overcome denials after denials. The clearer picture now of my vision of childhood also allowed me to accept the experience I had written about last time where I encountered and played with the same boy who was a sasquatch boy when I was five years old. I now can see that same boy now five years older leaning down to sniff the opossum then gingerly move his hands over the body of the opossum and then follow up with his feet moving across the path on all fours and disappearing into the woods. I also suspect the opossum due to it’s Oscar winning performance and leisurely stroll away was also the boys sibling but I do not have a memory of that younger or smaller child to fill in the gap with. I know now that he was saying good bye to his friend. I can also feel the presence of his mother near by who was helping to complete the illusion with her energy. She was very motherly to me and I can now remember her presence by her emotional resonance. Of which I can feel even now while writing this down. She along with her son have protected me many times throughout my life, even punishing me when I deserved it. Sometimes very harshly but deservedly so, like a caring but not coddling mother does.
I am now writing this down as an experiencer’s story because I am experiencing the vision quit often because once again the same emotion is in play, hopelessness. I am moving to Big Sky MT to live in the mountains above town without my family for a few weeks while my 7 year old finishes 2nd grade in Polson MT.
Once again I’m in the dark woods after getting knocked around nearing a rocky ledge while knowing that once again I am protected and as long as I do right by others and stay on the right path and of course listen to where the right path is I and my family will be okay.
I wish everyone had my hairy guardian angels, it took me a long time to accept there guardianship. It was worth the dark rocky path through the woods and occasional stumble over the ledge . So I suffered until I accept it then I rejoiced, tripped over my own feet, got up and rejoiced again and again until once again I have to brush off the dust and pick myself up again as I’m doing now heading to the next construction boom town. I’m confident my guardian angels will find just the right safe camp site where we can thrive for a while. Anyways, I’ve got a guitar to learn how to play; where better then while camping. This ought to annoy them a little until it becomes something beautiful, or something a little less but at least tolerable to listen to.
Thank you for reading